An Updated Version of Me... SOON.

my bestfriend was right... i could relate to this very well. i didn't know why i had to let things bother me... i don't wanna end up blaming myself. i will be strong... i will be strong enough to prove, it wasn't my fault. i'm tired being blamed. i'm done giving in to what other people say or think of me... i just wanna be happy. to do that, i have to start believing, that i'm right... and i'm doing well. i don't need to stay with people who thinks i'm not all that... because of who i am, i am different.

honestly, that's one of my dream right now, to do what Anne Curtis did at a scene in "The Wedding": to say, "I am different now..." and walk away. =)

to all the fighter girls out there, this is dedicated to you:

An Updated Version of Me
by: KC Concepcion

I know I can be so awkward at times
I can be insecure
You can call me naive, you can say I'm a child
You can say I'm so immature
For me to say that I love you now
But you'll see I will prove somehow
I can be so much more

Someday there's gonna be
An updated version of me
And somehow you're gonna see
An udpated version of me

And there would be no reasons then
To tell me that I'm just a friend
I'll be a much better person, you'll see
An updated version of me

Maybe I should grow a much nicer nose
A much prettier set of eyes
Maybe I should wear more colorful clothes
If it'd help you to realize
I've never been this in love before
Never wanted to change at all
Now I'm willing to try...

Someday there's gonna be
An updated version of me
And somehow you're gonna see
An updated version of me
And there would be no reasons then
To tell me that I'm just a friend
I'll be a much better person, you'll see
An updated version of me...

Maybe then you'd realize
Or maybe you won't
If and when that happens
I'd still be the lucky one...

'Coz someday there's gonna be
An updated version of me
And somehow you're gonna see
And updated version of me
And someday you would realize
You've made awful compromise
And you'd wished that you had wath you missed
'Coz you'd miss a much better person
An updated version of me
You will see...

No Fairytale, I Want To Forget

my love life's latest theme song...

WHITE HORSE
Taylor Swift

Say you're sorry, that face of an angel
Comes out just when you need it to
As I paced back and forth all this time
Cause I honestly believed in you

Holding on, the days drag on
Stupid girl, I should have known
I should have known

I'm not a princess, this ain't a fairy tale
I'm not the one you'll sweep off her feet
Lead her up the stairwell

This ain't Hollywood, this is a small town
I was a dreamer before you went and let me down
Now it's too late for you and your white horse, to come around

Baby I was naive, got lost in your eyes
And never really had a chance
I had so many dreams about you and me
Happy endings, now I know

I'm not a princess, this ain't a fairy tale
I'm not the one you'll sweep off her feet
Lead her up the stairwell

This ain't Hollywood, this is a small town
I was a dreamer before you went and let me down
Now it's too late for you and your white horse, to come around

And there you are on your knees
Begging for forgiveness, begging for me
Just like I always wanted but I'm so sorry

Cause I'm not your princess, this ain't a fairytale
I'm gonna find someone someday who might actually treat me well
This is a big world, that was a small town
There in my rearview mirror disappearing now

And its too late for you and your white horse
Now its too late for you and your white horse, to catch me now

Oh, whoa, whoa, whoa
Try and catch me now
Oh, it's too late to catch me now

Honestly, I just wanna forget... forget that I ever loved. Right now all I wanted is to be someone's priority. Not another schedule. A squeezed-in moment whenever they have time. I'm tired needing to prove myself. I'm done hoping to be someone appreciated without too much effort. Maybe, maybe it's time I give myself a chance to be loved without question. Without too much expectations. Yeah.. I'm just through.

Every night I pray for my love to fade already... I'm giving it back to Him. I really just want to move on and not dream anymore. Please... I don't wanna hurt anymore.